Ungatz

  

I lie awake at night reliving my owner’s manual to 

misery and her accompanying atlas of despair; my

destiny is an ending and narrowing cul-de-sac of 

nothingness, to fathom anything more from my birth,

whence all trouble came, is passing fiction as truth and lies

as certitude, death is unforgiving and death always wins, debtors take

heed in her odds, she never pays off on any wagers, you can’t pay off

any corpus delicti or stiff, man is born unto death, yet, death is patient 

as gnawing worms, the nights are reminiscent and loud with memories of 

youthful sprees and contemporaries, my passion is listening to old Classical, 

Blues, Jazz, and Latin albums of my collection, and understanding the genius 

in everything bound to our ears, prisoners to this earth and freedom are death, are

Are you in or are you out? 

Emptiness

 

The silence of night damnifies all living 

creatures, quietude’s nuisance to all 

dwelling things, only the vilest, wretchedness, and

vicious slither within these darken hours, they seek

you out in every crevice, nook, and cranny, this surfeit

of emptiness overwhelms, is this normal to shudder off 

this pain alone? This temporal and dreadful disease of 

misery finds every weakness, teems down deep within 

the hemispheres of your cause of existence, the embattlements

of secular defeat where you ask some hidden Ghost that's never there

or ever existed for guidance, you realize the game way too late, shun

religion as the real disease, now, you emolliate this madness with some

replacing elements to appease this anaemia, you are stricken with the 

curse, no matter how long you evade this knocking spell, no matter how 

far you run this anathema is far stronger, you realize this vexation 

only feeds off your frailty, this symbiotic relationship will exist as long 

as you're alive, you are your own madness.

The Hondo(page-12)

      

       Tim would load up Hondo and Jim every year in his jalopy and make their yearly pilgrimage to Cincinnati Reds’ Riverfront Stadium(now, no longer exists) and they saw some great players LIVE too: Dale Murphy who in 1982 and 1983 was the MLB’s MVP, World Series champion, Bobby Bonilla, and Louisville Redbird’s own batting star, Andy Van Slyke, and home-run king, Barry Bonds. Great times, but unfortunately not for the Reds, but in 1990 things changed, Cincinnati Reds swept the Oakland A’s in 4 to win their 5th World Series. These were fun times even though those long treks would wear them all out, their diseases were and still are so taxing on their lives.

       Hondo has endured far more than Job, he's suffered more in this life than Hercules, and he's tolerated more than God Himself; how he manages to rise in the mornings and greets every morning like it's his last is an inspiration to all who has suffered in this dire condition, it nauseates Tim to even dwell upon Hondo’s existence, more importantly, he is proud to tell everyone that he's not heavy he's his dearest brother. God may inflict hardship to us all in due time, but Hondo has endured a lifetime of Hell, and no one should have to walk, crawl, or crumble without a fight because Hondo is that enduring light, that last shining beacon of dim hope that keeps his brother Tim alive, and he's the keystone to the Hardesty Family, he's the rock that holds the fragile mortar to the wailing wall, Hondo and Hondo alone deserts no one, never has, he's the kindest brother on this earth, his heart is bigger than an elephant’s, and his memory is the gilded timekeeper that holds all these precious moments so dear. I can't imagine what Tim would do without his dearest brother always near. They're blood brothers until the great sever. 

                                                               THE END

                                                                        12

                                                               

Will You Miss Me?

    Hello friend, will you miss me

when the drinks and good cheer

spills and laughter fracture every

memory? Will you lament for those

scintillating moments we once shared and

that pretentious and arrogant windage

between two buddies? 

   Hello brother and sister, will you miss me

when puerile innocence and scuttled time

vanquishes all youthful aphorisms? Will 

you enshrine those forgotten and volatile

accompaniments that humbled our impoverished 

existential misery and existence? 

  Hello lover, will you miss me in the 

heart of Spring? Will you miss my breath

upon your lips? Will you miss my distinctive 

smell on the hallowed sheets in the mornings? Will

you revisit these trifling, coquettish, and ravishing 

allusions with harmonious flare? Will you laugh 

when my title is forsaken, or will you weep with 

gratitude? 

-  John Hardesty

7/20/2021

Entangled

There’s no rousing of memory and

the only flustrum of reason scurries away

into the vastness of entanglement, suspended in 

misery as the pilot of time keeps the uncharted 

 route in front of caution, rudderless to fate, careless

drift and reckless abandonment lead thee to solitary

disillusion, wandered beyond the means of caring,

you threw up both hands in defeat, and yet they shot 

you down in disgrace, mocked you, spat on you, and 

left you to your demise; years lapsed away as a mayfly's

life, you escaped the ridiculous cloister-controlled maze,

awoke upon some sacred rock and called it your refuge,

yet, they found you again, this time you fought back, now,

sundering power lit thy soul, aloft thy spirit, and death 

became upon all who entangled with sorcery, shuffled 

indistinguishable cantations spewed upon thy breath, scattered

fables now call you God. 

The Hondo(page-11)

 

       Hondo and his brothers Tim and Jim loved the Cincinnati Reds, their first family World Series was in 1975 in the family’s living room, viewed by a small 32-inch color television by the whole family including their mom who hated all sports, the games or World Series was Cincinnati versus Boston. It was a spectacular Fall, all across the North Atlantic trees were in their golden plume, geese were migrating South, and baseball was closing another remarkable year, the Reds were something to watch all season and Boston Redsox had all the MVP players too and their pitching was unhittable. But that World Series made Red fans out of every Kentuckian including the Hardesty family. Seven grueling games and the Reds were down at home in the last game but came from behind to win the 1975 World Series. Every day after school, Hondo, Tim, and little Jimbo played whiffle ball, they each pretended to be a Cincinnati Red’s player at each bat, they had a blast playing. 

       The 1975 World Series in the Hardesty’s family living room consisted of one Lazyboy chair that was occupied by their dad and their little brother Jim who always sat with their dad, a crowning chair that sat their queen and mom, a couch that sat four sisters, Kathy, Cheryl, Denise, and Janie, and Kevin and Tim shared the floor in front of the television, Tim lied down to the left and Kevin laid to the right and they would change each other's position during commercials, two hours was a long time and this World Series was an exceptional series that each game always went into extra innings or longer times due to pitching changes and substitutions. 

                                                                       11

The Hondo(page-10)

 

       Hondo and Tim bought tickets to see the rock group Molly Hatchet at Rupp Arena in Lexington. It was in the dead of winter when Kentucky always got dumped on by feet of snow not inches but the concert didn't cancel for some odd reason, but they loaded up in their dad’s Volkswagen Beetle and traversed to Lexington which was 60 miles away, but fortunate for them the Bluegrass Parkway was a straight stretch yet the roads were not plowed as they do now, rarely saw a state truck on the road in a dead blizzard back then, not a trace. Hondo got them there in one piece. They reached Lexington and made it on time even though they missed the first set of the local homegrown group called Exile who had a number one hit, Kiss You All Over, and miraculously saw them close their show with it. Then their group Molly Hatchet came on stage who Tim would later on in life meet the lead singer Danny Joe Brown of Molly Hatchet in person and shook his hand and also managed to meet up with .38 Special in Jacksonville, Florida who was the hottest band in the 1980s, where he became good friends with their road manager called Dino and their drummer Steve Brookins, who Tim won a fifty-dollar bet from Steve that he couldn't throw a football in the St. John’s River from Dino’s backyard mansion, it was 55 yards, they measured it, Tim took three steps and the ball was a tight spiral and nice arc and then splashdown, the football hit the St. John’s River, they were all in awe, Steve paid Tim and he immediately got respect, now they called Tim, Doug Flutey, after that, which Tim had that story backed up many times by his great friend Paul O’Bryan who sadly passed away this year, but Paul told them all. 

       Hondo and Tim grew apart by Tim’s marriage who later divorced and dispersed job locations yet stayed in touch with each other and their beloved little brother Jim(James Louis III) who attended EKU(Eastern Kentucky University), but every year while his brother was enrolled at EKU, Tim rode to Louisville and picked up Hondo and traveled all the way to Richmond to watch EKU’s very exciting Homecoming game, because Roy Kidd never lost a home game or many in his tenure at EKU, Tim saved their ticket stubs and they were EKU versus Georgia Southern at Roy Kidd Stadium on October 05, 1991, EKU eked out a win,  their very first game together and it really was an enjoyable game, they all managed to sat in front of EKU’s top linebacker’s sister who was so hot, she gave high-fives to all them after each defensive play, her brother had 5 sacks when they needed it too, an intense game, Georgia Southern was a powerhouse back then too, the following year on September 26, 1992, three days before their mlittle brother’s birthday(29th), the traditional migration was to Roy Kidd stadium versus Tennessee Tech who was awesome that year but EKU managed to win another squeaker! 

Hardesty’s Proverbs

                                                        HOPE

                                          Hope is the poor man’s tax.